All about me, berlin-artparasites Style

To the reader: If this is your first time on my blog, many greetings; If you've been here before, happy returns to you. Everything you read here will be my genuine unfiltered thoughts and secrets, explaining in full detail everything about me, piece by piece. I wish that you read on without prejudice or judgement, for I am not a perfect person, and I hope that you can connect and empathize with my life's story. -Alex

My Birthday is November 26, 1993.
My Father has a job, my Mother is staying home as a housewife.
They fight all the time about the stupidest things, and I've never heard them having sex (I don't think they can).
I love my siblings, despite the fact that one is things like a 10 year old at 18, and the other has almost zero respect towards other homo sapiens.
The worst fight I've ever gotten into was a small arguement I had with a girl I was madly in love with, and I promised her I wouldn't bother her again; to this day I have not spoken to her.
I love both my siblings; they're MY retards.
I always wanted to be *free* when I grew up.
My dream vacation is a trip high up in some isolated forest on a mountain, and just staying in a stone cabin by the fireplace when it starts to snow outside.
The most embarrassing thing that's ever happened to me I can't even remember, because I make a fool of myself on a daily basis. It's probably that time an elderly man walked *into my shower* while I was naked, showering, in a public toilet at the age of 12
I've never been to therapy, and the hardest thing I've ever experienced was watching someone I loved walk away without saying goodbye. I never overcame it; I just never stopped running.
When I look in the mirror I feel like i'm looking at an incomplete puzzle with half the pieces missing.
I think apearances do matter in a relationship, to a certain degree, like maybe 30%.
My favourite movie is probably The Lion King, because as a kid I always empathized with being left alone.
The book that changed my life the most was Kafka On The Shore, by Haruki Murakami.
The hardest I've ever cried lasted 33 days of crying on a daily basis.
The grandparent I loved most *was* my grandmother, father's side, and I never got the chance to apologise after we had a small fight. She's passed on now, and I've still not taken the time to talk/pray to her. Don't feel ready.
"We need to talk" makes me sick to the bone, because I've always been a fuck up, and every person that wanted to tell me so started with those words.
Halloween is my favourite holiday; the chance to be something that you're not is always an amazing opportunity.
I used to love Spring the most, now it's a tie between Spring and Autumn.
My favourite colour used to be Yellow/Gold, but then it became Purple for the longest time. I think I'm starting to favour Green though.
I used to hate rain; only recently have I been able to come to terms with it.
I'm not scared to die-- I would just regret dying now.
I don't believe in god, but I believe in a connection between all living things, a form of inertia that exists for the soul.
I don't have allergies.
My favourite food is pasta bolognese, and my favourite restaurant is one of the following: Woody's, Outback, ; long story short I love steak and ribs a lot too, in addition to pasta bolognese.
I do like to cook, just often times I feel it's too time consuming, especially if I can have someone else cook for me instead.
I do care about cleanliness, in terms of hygience, but not so much in terms of organization.
I don't have a political view; I just want the world be be more giving, and less strict / hellbent on "following the rules"
I am an equalist. I would not say I am feminist because that would incline me to know a lot of things that I don't; I just know what's fair and what isn't.
My favourite flower is the "Fiesta Flower", commonly found in California; but since no one knows of this flower, I usually just say "the Rose"
I have too many "favourite" songs, but the most memorable one for me is "Easier to Run", by Linkin Park.
I've had a lot of cats, and the one's I've had were always very well behaved; but I'd like to try having a dog, and raising it from a young age.
If a girl going through chemotherapy asked me to shave off my hair so she could have a wig, I would; But only if she asked/told me herself.
I'd like to have a house in Malaysia, and one in Canada, in that woods on the mountain I talked about earlier.
I'd like to Honeymoon on a cross-country trip, and see the world more.
I like fruity candy, ie. Nerds, or dark chocolate. Especially minty dark chocolate.
When I'm mad I stay very quiet and pent up, and if they persist I eventually explode, even when I know I'm in the wrong; my reasoning being that even if I'm wrong, that doesn't give you the excuse to grill me till I'm an erupting volcano. I'm not a pimple on your face, I'm a human being.
I'd rather have silver accessories over gold ones, because they look more sleek.
In high school I was the loner / nerd / geek clique, when I did hang out with anyone.
My spirit animal, I've always believed, would be a Jaguar.
I'd probably be Nightshade, if I were a flower.
I admire a lot of people. Very long list. Murakami, Kafka, Hugh Laurey, Quest Crew, Mike Shinoda, Amy Lee, Frank Sinatra, Patrick Stewart, Charlie Chaplin, Bill Nye, just to name a few.
I wish I was more charismatic with less effort.
I always worry that I'm a shitty person, even though I know deep down that I'm probably not.
What hurt me the most was accidentally pushing away someone who was once my best friend.
If you want to make me feel better, just shut up and cuddle.
I prefer kisses to hugs, but not everyone thinks kissing is morally decent.
My house looks like a barren canvas consisting of two floors, with conveniently placed rocks.
My dream car is probably an Audi R8; I don't know much about cars, but I know that's a pretty sweet one.
Celebrity life is not a strong suite, but the most tragic life award probably goes to Robin Williams. I miss that guy.
I think people become cold when you've left them outside for too long, and they forget the warmth of another human soul.
Nature versus nurture; The nature of a person can change if they are willing to change. Nurturing is a guide that help form the backbone of a person's future, but ultimately who they want to be is their choice alone. Not every nurturing parents successfully conveys that message though.
I don't believe in heaven, but aliens definitely(statistically it's impossible for there NOT to be other life), and mermaids, sure why not.
Reincarnation is a possibility, it would be nice to see nice people die and become other good things.
The bible may have truthful elements to it, with many exaggerations; I personally think of it as a history book that's been rewritten for children, like fable stories, meant to teach a lesson with exasperated stories.
My favourite feeling is complete and utter love. Sorrow comes as a close second. I'm bittersweet like that.
The best day I ever had was the day I felt complete; sadly, I lost the completing factor, and I'm back to searching for a replacement piece.
The best day I think would be to finally settle down after travelling the world with a significant other.
I see myself as a protector for all my friends; but as Dan Brown asks in Angels and Demons: Who guards the guard?
I deal with pain with parkour and writing.
If I had 100 million dollars, I'd send half to charity, a quarter into a business investment, an eighth into a trust fund, and the remaining I'd spend making me and all my friends's craziest ideas come true.
I do think wealth affects moral, up to a point.
I think writing is an amazing outlet that people should try building upon. It's a skill the helps people better understand themselves, and that's the first step to understanding the world.
If I could do it all over, I wouldn't. There's little I could have changed, and if I did change anything, the rest would come out a mess as well.
My biggest mistake is thinking that I am less than I deserve.
I wish I could speak several languages fluently: Chinese, Russian, Spanish, French, Hungarian, Arabic
I've loved three people whole heartedly in my life.
I might have loved the person I lost my virginity to at some point; but definitely not anymore.
I don't think I'm remarkable at all; I always think I'm lacking.
My Enneagram is (I just took the test) Type 4, with a wing type 5 (4w5).
You could improve the education system by making it less about what students know, and more about how they found out what they know.
People who commit suicide are neglected, ashamed, and in terrible pain. I've been through that phase, and people will call them cowards for wanting to spread that pain to other people they know; but if you had the choice of taking such immense pain away, you would not think twice. Adding guilt to the equation doesn't usually help.
If I could say something to them before they were about to commit suicide, I'd say "It is not my place to tell you what to do or what to think, but it really does get better over time, one way or another. Live on."
My favourite childhood memory is remembering my summers in Hungary with my grandparents, and various uncles; most of them have already passed away.
I like both tea and coffee; both I take without sugar, not too hot, and coffee I prefer black.
The last time I wrote someone a handwritten letter was towards the end of last November.
The best gift I've ever received was a dreamcatcher, from someone who was special to me.
The best piece of advice I've ever been given was "Learn to unsee the lines", referring to the boundary lines that people and rules define for us, and instead of following them, trying things out in different ways.
The last time I cried was right after New Years, when I wrote my last blog post; hopefully also the last time in a long while.
I'm very competative in board games; I just don't show it.
My favourite board game is actually the card game Magic: The Gathering, but if we're strictly referring to Board games with actual Boards, and not tabletop, then it's probably actually Monopoly.
I dont' feel pressured to settle down; I feel pressured to do the opposite actually.
The first thing I notice in a person is usually their physical characteristics, most notably their hair, eyes, body posture, how they walk, and whether their eyes furrow in distress, or arch in happiness. The second thing I notice is their voice, and how they talk.
My top three pet peeves are: 1) Replying a long text / rant with just a smilie, or single letter answer (K.), 2) always humming / singing something (silence is appreciated every now and then) 3) people constantly apologizing. I already do this enough for everyone, we don't need a second one.
I don't have any inherent phobias, but that's because I don't know I have one until the moment arises; and as soon as the moment is over and I think it through, I don't think I have the phobia.
Something I've always wanted to do, but didn't have the courage to do, was parkour; I've started that recently though, about 4 months back, so I guess that crosses that off the list.
When I'm overwhelmingly sad, I'll find a quiet place where no one knows me, like a cafe, and just listen to music while people watching.
I don't know how to ski. I've tried before, but an earlier injury prevents me from actually skiing properly.
If plastic surgery was 100% safe and painless, I'd probably still not get it. Tattoo's though, maybe.
I think home is where the heart is, and right now my heart feels like it's homeless, and needs to explore. I suppose that means right now I am without a home.
I definitely think politeness is important; it's imperative to have a level of chivalry and exemplary behaviour, especially towards people you do not know.
I think indecisive people need someone to take their hand and show them what it's like to be alive.
The only reason a person should ever go to war is to defend their own home, never to invade or push into another country's territory.
Something that scares me is the thought of being buried alive. And things that look or feel human, but aren't human.
I believe in therapy; but you don't need a licensed therapist to be in a therapy session. Sometimes, therapy with friends is more than enough.
I want few things from life. I want to feel happy, alive, appreciated, and understood. That's all I ask for.
When I think about my ideal partner, I imagine them loving to travel, a spark of crazy, spontaneous but genuine, and comfortable with social situations. Another wandering soul, I suppose.
If I could change anything about myself, I'd change the fact that I'm always thinking so negatively about myself. That, and my annoying mumbling when I talk.
As mentioned before, if I could change the world, I'd want it to be more giving. I'd probably make it more green as well. I like trees.
I want to be free, and happy, and madly in love.
I am Alex Vorosmarthy.


"I want to know your birthday and your parents jobs and if you ever heard them fighting or having sex and if you love your siblings and the worst fight you’ve ever gotten into and if you like one sibling more than the other and what you wanted to be when you grew up when you were seven and your dream vacation and the most embarrassing thing that’s ever happened to you and if you’ve been to therapy and if it helped and the hardest thing you’ve experienced and how you overcame it and if you like what you see when you look in the mirror and if you think appearances matter in a relationship or at all and your favorite movie and which books changed your Life and the hardest you’ve ever cried and which grandparent you loved the most and if the words “we need to talk” make you sick to your stomach and why and which holiday is your favorite and which season and which color and if you like rain and if you’re Scared of dying and if you believe in god and if you have allergies and to what and what your favorite food is and restaurant and if you like to cook and whether or not you care about cleanliness and what your political views are and if you’re a feminist and your favorite flower and song and if you’d rather own a cat or a dog and if you’d shave off all your hair to Give it to aLittle Girl going through chemotherapy and where you’d like to live and honeymoon and what kind of gum and candy you like and what you act like when you’re mad and if you’d rather someone buy you silver or gold jewelry or neither and what clique you were in in high school and what you think your Spirit animal is and which flower you’d be and who you admire and which traits you wish were more dominant and if you ever worry you’re a shitty person and what hurt you the most and why you ever thought you were worthless and how someone can make you feel better when you’re sad and if you prefer hugs or kisses and what your house looks like and what your dream car is and which celebrity you think lives the most tragic Life and why you think people become so cold and what you think about nature vs nurture and if you believe in heaven and aliens and mermaids and Reincarnation and the bible and which feeling is your least favorite and what was the best Day you ever had and what would be the best Day and if you see yourself as the protector or one who needs protecting and how you deal with yourPain and what you would do if you had 100 million dollars and if you think wealth affects people’s morals and what good you think writing is and if you could do it all over, would you and what would you change and what mistake was your biggest and which language you wish you spoke fluently and how many people you’ve loved and if you loved the person you lost your virginity to and if you realize you’re remarkable and what your enneagram is and how you think we could improve the education system and what you think of people who commit suicide and if you think they’re selfish and what you say to them before they did it if you could and what your favorite memory of your childhood is and how you Take your tea or if you prefer coffee and when you last wrote someone a handwritten letter and what the best gift you ever received was and what the best piece of advice was and when the last time you cried was and if you’re competitive about board games and which is your favorite and if you feel pressured to settle Downand what you notice first in a person and what your top three pet peeves are and if you have any phobias and what you’ve always wanted to do but don’t have the courage to go through with and what you do when you feel overwhelmingly sad and if you ski and if plastic surgery was 100% safe and painless, would you get it and where and why and where you think home is and if you think politeness is important and what you think of indecisive people and if you think there’s ever a reason to go to war and something thatScares you and if you believe in therapy and what you want in Life and what you look for in a partner and what you want to change about yourself and about the world and who you want to be and who you are. Just tell me who you are.”